


Flustering Cheeks

by AbbeyTheWeeb



Category: 18th Century CE RPF, American Revolution RPF, Historical RPF
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Feelings, First Time Cuddling, Fluff, Homophobia, John is a Mess, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, sleeping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:53:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28671816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbbeyTheWeeb/pseuds/AbbeyTheWeeb
Summary: John Laurens is in love with Alexander Hamilton. He does not know what to do, he loses his charm and turns into a blushing schoolboy when it comes to Hamilton.It is late at night and Hamilton is growing tired.
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens
Comments: 5
Kudos: 29





	Flustering Cheeks

The office is quiet, the only sound is from the birds from the outside and quills scraping ink onto paper. It is normal for here, it is where I work with all the other aides. It is hot this morning, all of us do not have our formal uniforms on, it’s too hot for them. 

Soon, the door opens, the creaking sound makes me look up from my work. It’s Gilbert and there is a grin on his face. “I need help with carrying trunks at my residence.”

The whole office smiles at him, he is the golden boy out of all the generals. He goes up to my desk and there is a pleading glare on his face. “John, can you, S'il vous plaît? I know you can lift up heavy things easily.” 

I cannot say no to my friend. I look down at all my work, there are piles of it, but I would rather get out of the hot office and help out Gilbert. Plus, I can always do them at night. I glance towards Tilghman. “Can you do this work when I am gone?”

He nods and collects a letter from the pile of my desk, “of course!”

I thank Tilghman and rise from my chair, stretching my back. And I can hear it cracking. I grunt at the feeling, these chairs hurt my spine each time I rise up from them. I set my quill down on my desk and Gilbert hurries to the door, waiting for me there. Before I can start to walk to the door, I can hear Hamilton erupt in sly laughter. I turn my head at him. 

“Of course he would ask you, Laurens,” he teases, he glances up from his work and I can see his violet sea-glass eyes. “I mean, you are an incredibly strong man.” 

The way he says it, I feel like time is stopping itself, all I can hear is my heart beating in response to his flirt. My mind grows hazy and I can tell it is not the heat in the office. He laughs at my reaction, he looks happy, he is beautiful. Finally, I can function again and I bow my head towards him and I go with Gilbert. 

As we get outside, Gilbert shuts the door and there is a smile on his face. He giggles a bit and I softly bite my tongue, I feel embarrassed. He springs towards me and pulls my sleeve. “He flirted with you,” he says. 

“So?” I stammer, I feel my cheeks burn. It is from the sun? I hope it is. I do not wish to get my sins to be caught by others. Gilbert has learned of it, and I am lucky that he does not care about people like me. Luckily, it is still in the morning, so there are not a lot of people out and I am less anxious about it. “He is just flirting.” 

Gilbert tugs on my hand and I stop. He lets go of it and he giggles softly, his mouth goes up to my ear and he says, “I know when you are lying, mon ami. You show your feelings easily when it comes to him. If you want to change that, I say work on the flushing on your face first.”

Hamilton looks beautiful, his red hair churns my stomach, He is only working on papers to send to Congress, why am I so in love with him? Especially at this moment? His eyes flutter every few seconds and the clocks are ticking, it is incredibly late. He is exhausted, he has been working hard all night and I have been working too, yet I keep on glancing up to stare at him. I am exhausted too, but not like him. I need to focus on my work better, but I cannot, he is handsome beyond belief. 

“Laurens?” he asks mischievously and I immediately fluster, he has caught that I have been staring. 

“Yes?” I manage to say, embarrassment flooding me. 

“You should do your work,” Hamilton yawns and he puts on a charming smile, striking my ever so lonely heart. “Although I don’t mind your handsome blue eyes, I think the papers would like to be written on.” 

I cannot say anything, no words come to my mouth to respond to his flirt, so I awkwardly obey him. My stomach feels odd and I know exactly what it is. Love. But also sin. I bite the inside of my cheek, I do not wish to have these sinful feelings. They are wrong and I do not want Hamilton to indulge in sin. He is a good man. No one needs to know my secret except Gilbert as I recall back to his teasing from the morning. I exhale, wishing my thoughts can go away and I write a letter, it is to my father. 

The minutes go by quickly and for some reason, I can feel Hamilton’s gaze on me, I do not understand why, it is just a particular feeling. My stomach bubbles in strange shyness. I am a charming man, I am incredibly near and well-conducted, being the son of Henry Laurens and all. But Hamilton… he is different. He destroys my charm, I wish for anything for him. He had red hair and he is beautiful. He is more charming than I and I cannot seem to contain myself from having affections towards him. 

All of a sudden, I hear snoring and it is so quiet, I can barely hear it. I glance up, wondering what it is. Hamilton is asleep, drained from his energy of the day. I see his chest go up and down ever so slightly, and I bite my lip. Once again, he looks beautiful. He looks like an angel. I stop staring, it is incredibly rude, even though he is asleep. Should I wake him? I do not know. 

I touch my cheek and I can feel the feeling of it. It is burning, warm from the blood in my cheeks. I need to stop with all this flustering, soon I will get caught and what will happen to me next? My father’s career will be ruined. I feel like a stupid schoolboy, melting over a young girl, but in my situation, it is the most beautiful man someone can witness. I clench my quill and bite my lip and try to write again, it is getting late and I need to finish this letter. 

The clock rings to signal that it is an hour and the office returns to silence again. Hamilton remains to be unwoken from the chiming, His head falls a little and I am afraid that he will collapse from his chair, but he remains still, like a statue, He is a male Pygmalion, the only thing that moves is his chest, where his heart resides. 

I look to see what hour it is on the clock and it is eleven, normally the time I go to bed. I rub my eyes and I can sense there were bags under the eyes. I need to go to sleep. I rise from my chair and stretch out my back, it cracks. I grunt, the chair is always uncomfortable on my back. Before I can walk towards the chamber, I look back. 

He’s beautiful, the candle is out and the room darkens. The moonlight shines on him, and his skin becomes a light blue from it. The chair must be uncomfortable for his back, just like mine, I do not wish to give him backaches. I think what is the best thing I can do to ease the pain, make him happy, that’s the only thing I want for him… and an idea pops up in my head. 

I can carry him to his bed in my arms. Suddenly I become weak with fear, I do not know why. Does Hamilton love me? His flirts make it seem like he does. But I do not know… but his back, my own backaches from the idiotic chairs that we have in the office. Plus, we sleep in the same room, so it will be understandable. I finally give in to my idea and open the door to our rooms and then go to him. 

I carefully put my hands on the back of his knees and my other hand goes for his shoulder. I try to remain quiet, I do not want to make anyone see. If they do, we will possibly be accused of being sodomites. I do not want that for Hamilton, he is better off alive than being dead. I finally pick him up and I almost laugh, he is surprisingly easy to carry in my arms, I sigh and peer down at him. 

His head starts to lean against my chest and my heart quickens ever so slightly. I do not want him to hear my heartbeat in his sleep. It is embarrassing when someone hears your sin. My heartbeat, my feelings, all sin. I shouldn’t love Hamilton. I find myself whispering, “let’s get you to bed.” 

After getting through the doorway, the candle in our room is still going strong. It is difficult for me to lay him down on his bed because his blankets are in the way, so I have to lay him on top of them. I cluck my tongue quietly and I stare at my bed, I have luxurious blankets from my father. Hamilton deserves them more than me, so I go to my bed and snatch them, they are soft on my hands. 

I lay them on to him and his bed sinks into the pillow more, his red curls spread out. I touch my cheeks again and they are still hot, and I am ashamed. He isn’t mine. I need to be cured just like Francis, he stopped having thoughts of indulging in men, My time has not come yet or I am forever in sin. Plus, Hamilton does not love me, I don’t think. He flirts with me, but that’s just his character, he flirts with everyone nonchalantly. 

I rub my face with my hands, I should go to bed, it is getting late. It is eleven, the time I go to bed. I huff a sigh and blink, my eyes are getting heavy from exhaustion and fear. I turn and my arms hang to my sides. Before I can start to walk up to the candle and blow it out, I feel a hand grab mine.

“Stay…,” Hamilton mumbles, I can tell it is him, and my whole world stops. I glance at him, his eyes are half-closed and there is a tired smile on his face. His grip on my hand isn’t a tough grip, but I can sense there is want in it. He mumbles, “John…”

The sound of my Christian name destroys me, just the way he says it. He wishes for me to fly with him, he does love me, I think he does, the sound of when he says my name. He has never said my Christian name before, I feel like a schoolboy, my face getting red, why the fuck am I acting like this? 

It’s because I adore him and his flirts and everything about him. 

“Hamilton, you know…,” I cannot say the last few words: this is sin. Hamilton knows I am sure, he is the smartest man in the world. I wish to please him, there will be nothing wrong with it, he is safe. He looks needy and I wish to please him. “Hold on.” 

He grumbles as I walk up to the candle, my hand falling from his grasp. I watch him as I take the candle and blow it out, the only light on him is the moonlight again. My heart trembles, he is beautiful, the most beautiful thing out there. He is beauty himself. I do a simple smile as I go to the door, closing it and locking it.

I take off my boots and wonder how I can crawl into bed, it’s been so long since I have done this. I finally succeed as I come from the end of the bed and my back is at the wooden wall. The bed is just the right size for two people to be snug. This feels more than awkward, I do not know what to do. I need to keep my calm, but how can I?

Hamilton’s body is turned away from mine, all I can see are his locks and shoulders and the outline of his body from the blankets. I watch the moon from the outside of the window, how can I make this less awkward for the both of us?

In a short time, he turns his body to face me and I watch him open his eyes the smallest bit and there is a little smile on his face. He moves his head closer to my chest and I can tell he hears my heartbeat. He hums and mumbles, “this fine?” 

“Yes,” I manage to get out. I cannot believe we are having this conversation, this intimacy of cuddling. 

He does not say anything back, but he moves his body closer to mine and he nuzzles a bit to my chest. I gulp, the cocky, smart, dashing Alexander’s head is near his chest and I have a realization, he loves me, as much as I do. The man who has changed my entire way of thinking and who has destroyed my charm each time I am near him… he loves me. I can sense there is a little smile on his face and I start to calm down ever so slightly. 

Alexander wearily mumbles, “warm.” 

I bite my lip, my heart throbs for him. “My chest is warm?” I awkwardly say. I feel like a fool. 

He nods ever so slightly and he rests his head on his hands, and exhales, he is truly comfortable while I am strangely not. My arms are to my sides and I do not know what to do with them. Do I hold him or not? I take a chance as I wrap my arm around his hip and pull him in closer, this feels so right. “This fine?”

He nods and I relax. I am at peace with myself for once and all the blushing fades away from my face. We are together and that is all that matters. I run my fingers through Alexander’s hair, it’s soft against my fingers. 

“John…,” Alexander mumbles, he is fading into sleep more and more, “goodnight.” 

“Goodnight, Alexander,” I say.

I start to flutter my eyelids and I finally close them, as my exhaustion overtakes me. I start to rest and I feel happy for once, his body in my arms and we are sleeping peacefully together.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!


End file.
